Down and Out

So, I was saying in previous posts that yervoy has been sapping the life out of me. I have been really sick with nausea and losing weight. I have been resting most of the day throughout the last couple weeks because I do not want to up chuck anything. With so much time laying around, I have been having a pity party for myself. I have been upset over this diagnosis. Emotionally drained thinking that, I will have a reoccurrence at anytime. I am paranoid and depressed. I keep on reading blogs of others who are so positive and have such a strong faith in God. I doubt my health especially at this time because I am so weak now. I think I am going to die from this awful disease although I have had clear scans.

Lord, Give me faith to do your will and accept your plan for me.

Have not posted in awhile

Well as of lately, I have not been posting lately. The treatments of Yervoy are just making me tired . I feel likes baby on how much I sleep. At  one point I was taking two naps a day morning, afternoon, and going to bed at 8pm. Since, I just had my third treatment with the clinical trial. The accumulation of all the medicine in my body is having its effects but I seem to be on the mend. I need less sleep lately and able to take care the little ones without having someone around to help.

I also lost a lot of weight in a 3 week time period. 16 pounds total. I went from 155 to 140 . My. Weight lost plan is surprising working wonder. (just kidding). Part of the reason, I lost so much weight is I had a horrible case of nausea and I had no appetite because of it. Hopefully, I can get progressively stronger with little implications and side effects.